Wants & Needs

We all know that life is a constant struggle between what we want and what we really need.  We all need, food, shelter, and companionship.  We can survive without companionship, but humans are social creatures; isolation from contact with other humans can quickly drive us into depression or even insanity.  That’s why when the prison system really wants to punish someone, they don’t beat or torture them, they put them in isolation, a small dark room, with no company besides that what they can conjure in their own mind.  It’s barbaric.  But it’s effective.  The human animal so craves other humans that even the strongest mind can eventually go batty. 

I have food and I have shelter.  But I’ve lived on my own for quite some time now.  Don’t know if I’ve gone batty yet, but I’m kinda over the whole “alone” thing.  There’s much to be said for being single and free.  Get up when I want, go when and where I want, do what I want…nobody to have to accommodate or coordinate with.  But I admit, sometimes I get lonely… 

There is much in this life that I want to do.  One of my lifelong dreams has been to sail a boat around the globe.  I specifically want sail to surf destinations and other areas of interest.  I want to be free to take as much time as I want, to stay in different locations as long as I want.  To surf and live on the sea.  When I was younger, I read about solo sailors who made long ocean passages to exotic lands; I thought that would be my goal too, to do it alone.  But the longer I live with myself, by myself, I realize I would probably go batty.  I’m a people person; I need human interaction.  I want companionship.  It is probably too much to hope for, that I could ever find the right person, someone who shares my passion for surfing and the ocean, someone who is tough enough to take the stormy days with the sunny, days of perfect surf with the days of blown-out junk.  Someone I could live with in close quarters who I would not want to toss overboard after a few days at sea; who would not want to toss me overboard after a few days at sea. 

But still, I dream.  I’m a dreamer; always have been.  I want to believe that I have a soulmate out there.  Someone who even if I never realize my dream of sailing to all these exotic places, maybe at least someone who can share the usual adventures of life.   A downeast clambake on an August day in Maine.  Beer and bonfires, ukulele plinking a soft melodious background soundtrack.  Lazy lounges in a hammock.  Camping on a deserted beach, falling asleep under the stars to the rustle of waves offshore.  Someone to accompany me with on long road trips; munching Cheez-its and Oreos, stopping at greasy diners for greasy eggs and bacon; singing out loud the lyrics to all the Partridge Family tunes…

I have food and I have shelter; basic needs.  I live in Maine; my home base, my sanctuary.  Herewith a few more things I want:

I want to surf J-Bay, this is my top-list want.

I want to travel and surf Ireland; it’s where my ancestors come from.

I want to surf Burleigh, Kirra, Bells in Australia.

I want to road-trip the California coast, maybe Baja too.

I want to surf the North Shore, cuz if you’re a surfer, ya just hafta…

I want to road-trip across America, possibly by Harley.

I want to bicycle up Alpe-d’Huez.

I want to sleep the whole of a rainy day in bed with someone I love.

I want to climb Mt. Katahdin, and maybe Mt. Washington again.

I want to see more of the coast of Maine.

I want to surf and camp the coast of Nova Scotia.

I want to learn how to play my guitar and my ukulele better.

I want to sing, maybe professionally…in a coffee shop or something!

I want to stroll a beach on a sunset evening, hand in hand with the love of my life…

I don’t know if all that is too much to ask for.  Maybe in this life we only get what we need, rather than what we want.  But a girl can dream…